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| Hours old..the journey began here |
First of all I'd like to share why I made the decision to breastfeed; it is important to start here because this is where you may need to draw strength from later in your own journey. I recommend making a list of your own reason. Here are my top 5 reasons I chose to breastfeed:
- Because I wanted to have this experience with my child
- For my child's health benefits
- (This is honesty) To save lots of $$$$$
- (again honesty) The convenience, no heating bottles, packing formula, running to the store for formula..etc
- (more honesty) Less mess and clean up..no washing bottle after bottle after bottle...after bottle..
Okay, so now that you know my reasons and what I wanted before my little boy Isaac was here lets dive right into the reality of it all in what REALLY HAPPENED....Hours after Isaac was born I was told by the nurse that my nipples were too short and not 'good for breastfeeding'. She immediately tried to placing a nipple shield on me. I quickly told her to remove it as I wanted to try without it. Isaac was crying and crying and could not latch with it on. Once I did away with the shield he latched and was doing good however Isaac wasn't more than 2 days old when the hospital let me know that he had lost too much weight and was not getting enough from me so supplementing with formula was a must! Of course you need to do what is best health wise for your child so I started the supplementing.
Supplementing
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| Isaac feeding with expressed milk |
**$$ saver tip: Check with your healthcare provider they may offer discounts that is one of the reason we purchase this pump through the hospital or rent one first to see if you like it before making the investment of purchasing your own.
Getting over your lack of success
This is the perfect time to take that list of reasons why you chose to breastfeed out! At this point in my journey I was completely on the fence about if I was going to pursue breastfeeding. I was physically and emotionally drained and was tired of dreading every feeding. I did know if this was a 'normal' feeling but I sure felt like a failure in more ways than one. Isaac was not latching and every time I tried he would freak out bellowing out screaming and wailing cries that would break my heart each time we tried to feed. If you are at this point here are some suggestions and tips:
- Ask for help and get SUPPORT!!
- Find a local mothers group that may emphasize in lactation issues **I found a FREE group through Palo Alto Medical Foundation that is open to the public
- Set up an appointment with your health care providers lactation consultants these are FREE usually for at least one or two visits after birth.
- Contact FREE advise lines with feeding experts: Similac for Strong Moms (800)986-8800
- Hire a lactation consultant that came come to your home, this is not free but it can be helpful to be in your own home setting.
- KNOW this is a learning time for both Mommy and Baby! Just like you need to learn how to breastfeed your baby really does need to learn how to feed!! (it took me a while to really understand this)
- RELAX!! RELAX!! RELAX!! then remind yourself to RELAX!! Stress will hinder your progress, and baby can tell when Mom is not relaxed.
- Don't listen to everyone's opinions
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| Tired and broken down is the understatement |
When seeking to set up your support team it is important to make sure that you are in fact getting support and help! If you are seeing a lactation consultant (LC) that you do not feel comfortable with find another one. It is very important that you feel relaxed and comfortable. When I went to my free visit through my healthcare provider I did not feel like it was a good match with the LC. So, I didn't not return for another visit I just pursued other support systems! It is also important to NOT listen or take with a 'grain of salt' others opinions. I really struggled with this one, not just because it is an emotional time and you are already dealing with so much but because their words can truly discourage and hurt you. Although they surly mean well and are not chiming in to hurt your feelings it can happen and that is why it is very important to just go on auto pilot and ignore it. Remember you are trying to build a supportive environment to succeed in and not to be torn down and feel like a failure.
What there is Costs!?
This portion is not so much about breastfeeding but about the the investment of money and cost of breastfeeding. Well, you might be saying what cost!? And that was my reaction before this journey...So if you recall my #3 reason for choosing breastfeeding what to save money. Well, of course you will save lots and lots of money in the long run, however there will be an initial investment that you will need to make and some minor reoccurring cost that you can encounter. Your cost breakdown can be different than mine and some of these items I did get as gifts but to simplify it I'll just like the items I used and the average costs:
- Nipple Shields (to help baby latch) - 2 pack $14
- Lanolin (helps with sore or cracked nipples) - $8
- Breast Shells (collect milk and help air out nipples [loved theses!!]) - $20
- Nursing pillow - $20-$40
- Nursing Shirts and Bras - $20-30 each
- Hospital grade breast pump rental - $20 per week average of 1 month = $100
- Manual Breast Pump - $50
- Electrical Breast Pump and accessories - $300-$400
- Milk Storage bags 50 count - $9
- Breast pads 100 count - $12 *you can get reusable ones but the never worked for me I always leaked through
- Lactation Consultant 3 visits for $180
- Antibiotics for thrush and mastitis - $40
Average Estimated Total --$800 - $1,000
Keep in mind your cost will vary depending on what you use. PLEASE know that I not my this laundry list of items to discourage you from breastfeeding!! It is just simply to help you prepare for what is potentially to come. Even though the average costs could total up to $1,000 formula feeding is still more expensive and on average for just the formula alone you could spend $1,900. All in all breastfeeding solely to save money may or may not pan out is more my point. Yes, over the long run you will save money but its not 100% free.
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| Milk Drunk |
I explain my success with breastfeed like a light switch. It was as if Isaac had flipped the switch on that day and just decided that he would do it. Before we had success with just the breast it was a matter of trying and trying again. You may read in other breastfeeding material about 'offering the breast first', well this may be hard if your child does what Isaac did and that is: want food right away..going from zero to sixty on the freak out scale!! So I completely understand if you don't offer the breast first at every feeding. However if you don't offer it they aren't going to learn to take it, so it is important to find a balance of what will work for you and your baby.
I did a number of trial and error methods which included:
- Trying to get to him before he was too hungry
- Feeding some from the bottle then trying to slip the breast in
- Using a nipple shield
- Try different holds until you find one that works well
Even though I didn't offer him the breast at every feeding however I did keep trying! It was not easy and like I mentioned before I wanted to cry before every feeding because I didn't know what to expect. Yet, to reach my goal of breastfeeding success I had to dig deep many many times. There is a couple of analogies that come to mind when I think about breastfeeding and the best one that I can think of to compare it to is learning how how to ride a bike but not just any bike a tandem bike. Not only will you need to help of someone to teach you how to ride the bike you also need the help of the other person on the bike to make it successful. In this case the other person would be your baby! So even though you may be doing everything right and just the way that you are being taught to do it, you still need your baby to learn as well. Like riding a bike you are going to fall, it may hurt, you'll cry, be upset and probably not be very successful at first but you won't learn if you don't keep at it and then once you get it down its seriously the easiest thing ever! And those days of struggling and dreading feeding will be long gone.
Overall, there is now right way or wrong way to feed you baby in my opinion. I think that as Moms we are faced with more decisions than we could even begin to count. In the end it is important to do what is best for your family not what everyone else thinks that you should be doing. Breastfeeding Isaac has been a wonderful journey and it sure has been filled with its ups and down. When he was a newborn I could not imagine what our nursing experience would be like months down the road. It was just to hard to even comprehend much during those first weeks home and now we have come a very long way in the journey and to say that it is what I expected would not be the truth at all. As for the future I plan to continue to breastfeed him until his is 12 months and then start to wean him. He will be 8 months at the end of this month and it seem odd that he is closer to the end of our journey than the beginning...that is the hard part to comprehend at this point. I want to close by leaving you with my top 5 tips to summarize what I feel made my journey what it is today.
- Follow your Mommy instincts -- believe me you do have them
- Find a comfortable place to nurse for you and your baby - ours ended up being in my bed propped up with pillows. Isaac is not a fan of the rocking chair or couch.
- Find the hold that your baby likes - Isaac only would latch well in the cross cradle and the same it true for today.
- Establish a good support team
- Patience and Persistence
If you have any questions please leave them in the comments, enjoy your journey!!
