Legacy of Love

Forever in my heart

My Grandma was an amazing woman in more ways than I could ever put into words. Recently, she has been coming to mind often. I even have had this reoccurring dream that she is sitting right there talking to me about current issues. This is not one of those 'creepy' visits from the beyond kind of dream but definitely very life like. I know that she has gone home to a much better place to be with God, her husband, and other loved ones that we have lost but I still have that selfish pull that says, "I want you here with me!". She passed away around the time that I was 16 years old, so I did get to spend all of my young childhood, and adolescent years with her and for that I do feel truly blessed. However, I still miss her the older I get. When I got engaged to Eddie, I was over joyed and excited ready to plan the wedding and start the guest list however I knew that not only would it be one person short but that it would be short of any grandparents. With all the joy surrounding my planning I just couldn't shake the feeling of wanting to have my grandma meet Eddie (not for approval) but because I know she would of loved him! My wedding has come and gone (April 09) and I know that all the wishing and wanting in the world will never allow me another conversation, hug, or simple I love you.

A few years before she passed, she got together with my Aunt Mille to create a recording on a cassette tape and labeled "A Legacy of Love". I have always cherished this recording of her voice because I have many pictures of her but to be able to hear her voice is such a special treasure. Shortly after Eddie and I were married I played the tape for him, and someday I will play it for my kids. There are things that I will never forget that are not on the tape like: how she had the softest hands, the nicest nails, the smell of her compact, cracklin' oat bran, blueberry pancakes, how Janelle and I told her when she snores she sounds like "Darth Vader", Skip-Bo, her automatic card shuffler, hot water in Tutu mug, or her pink Extra gum packs. To be honest after this small list I have tears rolling down my cheeks. I just miss her so much!

Today I thought about what she would think about how the times have changed. She had beautiful penmanship and now a days most just send and email, or how I changed my profile picture on Facebook to her and me would she be on Facebook for me to tag her in the photo? (her daughters are on FB!). This is a woman who saw this county take shape through the depression, wars, and politics. So I don't know that she would be so impressed by technology or think it silly? To end on a happy note, I am proud to be her granddaughter and to still have the memories of her legacy is enough for me.